When I try to write about something of the past, even if it’s just a second ago, it’s somehow so difficult. I can’t reconnect to the energy to put it into words. I have this problem for days now, trying to write posts.
Do you know these little plastic toy cameras for kids? You look into the view finder and with each click a little disk turns and you see a totally different scene or image.
This currently happens on an energetic level. *Click* energy has changed, and I have to adapt myself to it. It shifts me around like a wild roller coaster. From bliss to euphoria to depression to doubts to optimism to neutrality, from abundant energy and body strength to body ache and tiredness to insomnia to hyperactivity to sleeping all day long… etc. you might know it.
Now, yesterday was a sweet day. i made it be one, after tuesday was horror. I created ‘feeling good’ all morning, until I decided I was able to continue in the city. When I was a child, I loved being in the city. Nowadays I have so many duties, I just run from a to b to c, having no fun at all. It’s overdue to change that. No duties today.
I took a big bag full of stuff with me, which I wanted to drop into a charity container on the way to the bus. Unfortunately the container was gone. I went for the one around the block, it was gone too, duh! I went down the hill and could have freaked out because that one was gone as well! I should have walked into the other direction when I went out of the house, to the one I know still stands for sure, I thought. So I walked back up the hill, grumpy about the cold and the extra walk.
When all my work for a good mood seemed to be lost, I came by a pond. A mother or nanny and a little child were feeding the ducks and egyptian geese. The ducks where cackling and a craw calling (like I filmed it two years ago). I love this sound so much, it goes into me so deep and it’s so healing.
Between all the mallard ducks, I discovered a male mandarin duck, uncommon in this area, and made a video to share his beauty with you. ↓
The day taught/reminded me, that being aware and quietly makes rebalancing a child’s play. Being aware reminded me of the Ones of all, the perfect flow and order that lies behind all. Feeling this flow in, around and through me, it’s calmness yet so powerful, the timelessness… it soothed me. I smiled. And with this smile, I knew I was okay.
Have a blessed time ❤